Happy New Year! 

Every new year, we are reminded of the newness of another year. Regardless of whether you set a New Year’s resolution, you observe your life and compare it to what last year felt like. As a person who enjoys optimizing, I look to see what I can add, remove or adjust in my life. Perhaps add some cardio to my workouts or eat more vegetables. Maybe it’s the need to call my family more regularly or practice that instrument I bought three years ago. A new year brings about reflection and excitement of what’s to come. 

According to Kelly McGonigal, willpower is the most important aspect to improving our lives. In her book The Willpower Instinct, McGonigal explains that we are all born with a capacity for willpower, but some use it more than others. She says, “People who have better control of their attention, emotions and actions are better off almost any way you look at it.” Not only are they happier and healthier, but their relationships are more satisfying and last longer; they make more money; they go further in their careers, and are better able to deal with conflict and overcome adversity. The benefits to increasing your willpower and self-control extend to all aspects of a person’s life.

Starting 2022, we are given this boost of energy and an extra dose of willpower to make the changes we really want to see for ourselves. The problem happens when our old habits creep in and our new changes become stale. We dream of our goal, and it becomes easier to rely on what is comfortable and what we’ve done for years than it is to adopt new behavior. Although change is constant, conscious change is difficult. We’ve likely been dreaming, hoping, secretly wishing for this change for longer than the amount of time actively working toward the goal. We get stuck. Gabriele Oettingen, author of Rethinking Positive Thinking, noticed that when we move into the wishing stage of a goal, you undercut the energy needed to do it. Instead of stopping at the wishing stage, we need to plan for failure, a process Oettingen coined as “WOOP!”

WOOP is an acronym for Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, Plan. Wish for what you want to see in your life – big or small, personal or professional. Think of what the number one benefit or outcome would be if you achieved this wish. What obstacle within you stands in the way of you achieving your wish. Plan for how to get around the obstacle. What is the most effective thing you could do?

The perfectionist inside us all wants change to look a certain way and have a clear linear path. This is where you really need to take a step back and increase your grittiness, willpower or self-control. Change is not linear. But you can work at anything and get better at anything. Good or bad, positive or negative. In order to do what you desire, you need to pause and plan, and by increasing your willpower, you have the fuel to help make the changes that you desire to make.

How do you increase your willpower?

McGonigal has three key factors to increasing your willpower, and all of them are considered keystone habits or habits that unintentionally carry over into other aspects of your life.

1. Meditate: Meditators increase their focus, self-control, impulse control and self-awareness among many other benefits. Regular meditators have more gray matter in the prefrontal cortex, which is the region of the brain responsible for responding and making decisions. Think of meditation as a gym session for your brain.
2. Breathe: Lengthening your breathing cycles to four to six breaths per minute. It is significantly longer than the usual 15-20 breaths a minute most of us take. Practice lengthening your breath in order to reduce stress and give yourself the extra second it takes to pause and plan a response to stimulus.
3. Exercise: Exercise is the closest thing to a wonder drug that self-control scientists have discovered. It not only helps your cardiovascular health, but it also helps the mind. It makes you happier and more focused. 

Here’s what a plan might look like to achieve all three factors:

1. In the Nonahood, we offer a FREE meditation class every Wednesday morning at 7 a.m. at Dockside next to Canvas. 
2. For the next minute, breathe in for four seconds and out for six. It should take 6 breaths to complete one minute. Try it for a week every morning.
3. Walk for 20 minutes, join a local gym, or find a personal trainer in the Nonahood. Do your activity of choice and stick with it daily! And when you see yourself wishing, WOOP!

Here’s to a wonderful 2022 and a mega dose of willpower to us all!