What is your definition of living a balanced life?
Before the Covid-19 quarantine, the term for life balance was having an optimal work-life balance. As if we are separate beings when we are working and there are only TWO aspects of our lives. The term “work-life balance” no longer exists. Work and life are intertwined, and there is a whole lot more to being balanced than simply focusing on two of our many roles.
We are multifaceted individuals. We play many roles and adopt many behaviors throughout the day. Self, employee, spouse, parent, friend, boss, these are simply a few of the many roles ONE person can have. There is also living a balanced life in your behavior: diet, fitness, organization, finances, socializing. Our misconception is that things will be better, more balanced, and easier in a near, yet distant future.
We will be balanced when…
Unfortunately, that is not the case. Balance won’t magically appear someday when that thing happens: more money, more time, more vacation. These are the lies we tell ourselves to keep chasing. We are habituated to the chase and can’t seem to rest in the present moment. We simply keep chasing that feeling of being whole.
The good news is balance is always within you. Tapping into your inner quiet strengthens your inner balance.
Your mind is constantly thinking, feeling, worrying, questioning. It is natural; we are human. But as you turn the volume down to all the mental noise, you begin to experience the quiet listener that is always within.
You are not your thoughts, emotions, sensations. You are the one who experiences and is observing. Providing the space to observe reduces the noise and provides a sense of peace.
We practice feeling balanced before we are stressed. Morning and evening routines help us return to a state of calm. Daily mindfulness practices help us practice returning to the present moment.
A morning routine is a great way to grow the sensation of balance. By practicing a morning mindfulness and/or present moment awareness meditation, you habituate the mind and body to seek calm. It’s a training in feeling calm during a time of minimal stress. Carving out a few minutes before the morning hustle begins lets you enjoy a feeling of peace and balance. This develops a mental strength. Over time, you’ll tap into this strength with less effort and more ease. In addition, the routine will cause the body to feel a state of balance daily and provide a sort of “homecoming” for the mind. You’ll have a routine that you know will allow you to return to a state of balance daily, especially during stressful days.
Evening routines allow us to build positivity bias and recall the good within. Feeling good about your day creates a sense of balance. It allows you to experience and bring focus to the things that are working. A gratitude practice is excellent for an evening routine.
As you go about your day, using present moment awareness practices let you return to the current moment. Our minds enjoy practicing mental time travel. We regret times that have passed. We worry about the future. We replay events in our minds and create possible futures. Although there is a time and place to learn from the past and plan for the future, when we get stuck ruminating or feeling anxious, we lose our sense of balance.
First, become aware of these moments of mental spiraling. Next, practice quick present moment awareness exercises to return to a state of balance. Scanning a room for a specific color, noticing the sensations of the body, or taking a few mindful breaths are quick ways to return to the present moment.
Finding balance is not a quest we are on that will be resolved in a near, yet distant future. Balance is recognizing the peace inside. Balance is letting go of the search and quieting the mental chatter to experience all that is possible. The more we practice observing our thoughts and mental chatter, the stronger we’ll become at feeling balanced.
