I would like to share a secret with you. Shhh… it is a secret that current PTA presidents don’t want you to know because, if you did, they would never have anyone to chaperone the Back to The Future Fifth Grade Dance, bake muffins for the teachers’ appreciation breakfast, or sew costumes with zero money and only two days’ notice. It is a secret that others will tell you is just a myth, something that they heard of but never spoke of for fear of what would happen next. Are you ready, my friend? Come closer. Closer.
IT’S OKAY TO SAY NO!!!!
Since my kids are in high school, opportunities for volunteering are not as readily available. Or so I thought. You see, as your kids get older and involved in extra activities…you become involved in them, too. My daughter’s love for the theatre turned me into a Drama Mama – able to transform cardboard boxes into Easter Island head statues and pool noodles into red velvet ropes. Every time I said, “Yes,” I whined and complained and swore to my husband that I wouldn’t do it again. “Stop me before I volunteer again,” I would say…and he would laugh, knowing full well that when it comes to my kids and their school, I would never say NO.
I am not saying you shouldn’t volunteer. On the contrary, you should. Volunteering is an important ingredient in school success and a wonderful way for families to stay connected. Teachers are underpaid and overworked and could really use an extra pair of hands and eyes. Yup, volunteering is a necessary evil to get things done, and those dedicated parents who devote hours to bettering things for our kids’ schools deserve medals. And WINE… lots and lots of wine.
All this said, when the PTA president calls you and says, “We know you’ll say yes to anything, so we thought we’d exploit your time and energy just one more time to serve on the Committee to Form More Committees”…it might be time to say NO!
When you haven’t seen your kitchen table in weeks because it is covered in cut-out paper frames, glue bottles and glitter…it might be time to say NO!
When you have cut so many box tops that your scissors are no longer sharp…it might be time to say NO!
And when you set out to go the grocery store but you accidently drive to the school instead…it might be time to say NO!
But when you walk backstage of the high school theatre and the entire tech crew comes running over to say hello, and you see the look of joy on your daughter’s face as she hugs you and whispers, “Thank you for all you do, mom.”…it might be time to say YES!
Sharon Fuentes is an award-winning freelance writer, parenting advisor, author of the book, The Don’t Freak Out Guide to Parenting Kids with Asperger’s, and a mom who is just winging it! You can reach her at sharon@sharonfuentes.com.
