I was a good kid growing up … well, at least by society standards. I did what I thought I was supposed to do: go to school, get good grades … I was even active in theatre after school, which kept me from getting into too much trouble. I guess you could say that, for the most part, I didn’t cause any of the grownups in my life too much heartache.

One day, when I was a junior in high school, I remember missing the school bus and having to have my dad take me to school. The night before I had stayed up extra late studying for an exam and catching up on other homework that I had not gotten to because my after-school rehearsal ran late. I was exhausted and slept right through my alarm.

My father could feel how stressed I was and did not complain about driving me. In fact, he was doing everything he could to make me laugh. Which explains why he was so surprised when I broke out in tears and said, “Can I skip school today? I think I need a break.” Without even a second thought, my dad turned the car around and took me to Corky’s Diner, where he let me order spaghetti and French fries at 7:30 in the morning (I know, gross), and, more importantly, he allowed me the mental health day I had no idea I needed so badly.

That day, I learned a life lesson. Who would have thought that spaghetti and French fries could teach me about the importance of self-care and allowing ourselves permission to take a break?

Growing up is hard. REALLY HARD! Kids today are being forced to grow up and navigate a world that the adults around them don’t even understand. Their days are filled with AP/IB/Honors/Dual Enrollment classes, after-school activities, volunteering hours, family commitments, balancing friendships, and, of course, thinking about their futures. Add to that the anxiety of just being a kid at a time where school shootings and violence are a common occurrence, parental divorce is at its highest, economic hardships are all around us, depression, anxiety, bullying, learning disabilities, mental health issues … the list goes on and on. It is fair to say that kids today are not living the carefree lives we might think they are.

Now, I know a lot of folks reading this might be thinking that kids these days are too soft … heck, they might even call them “Snowflakes.” These well-meaning people believe that this generation of youth have it easy and that we need to prepare them for the inevitable challenges they’re going to face in life. I understand this way of thinking. Really, I do! However, when my 15-year-old daughter called me from school freaking out because her water bottle broke and spilled all over her backpack and she needs to just go home, I knew it was much more than her acting like a “snowflake” who was going to melt from getting wet.
So, I did what my father would have done … I picked her up from school, dried her off and went to breakfast. Between bites of chocolate chip waffle, my sweet girl admitted just how stressed she was, how much she needed the day off, and how grateful she was that I allowed her to do so. It was a good day off, too. We cuddled on the couch, she caught up on her AP class work, she took a nap, she relaxed … she was able to breathe!

It is vital that we teach our children the importance of hard work, encourage them to reach for the stars, and to become responsible members of their community. But, it is equally important that we teach our kids the value of self-care, that taking a break is not being weak and that it’s more than okay to just stop once in a while and BREATHE!