Independence is something we all long for after we turn four. We want to decide what we wear and what we eat and who we are friends with at the tender age of four. The responsibilities that come with independence only increase with age. When we turn 16, all we want to do is drive, so we can go wherever we want whenever we want. When we turn 18, we can vote, and at 21, we can drink and so many other responsibilities that come with our newfound independence.
Sometimes, however, these new independent freedoms come with facing new challenges alone. As we grow up, I have found that there are more and more things you have to do alone. The older you get, the smaller your friend circle tends to become. We spend more time away from friends and family at work alone and have to do adult chores typically alone. I’ve never had a friend willingly come with me to the DMV, so I had to go alone. Being alone for the first time can be scary, but it’s something that should be looked at positively.
Being alone facilitates so many things and makes others harder; however you look at it, being alone is part of growing up and happens more often as we age. It can be scary to face so much independence all at once, but it happens to everyone. I have learned that as I travel internationally completely alone for the first time (and I mean completely alone, I know absolutely no one) that this will make me stronger and better equipped to handle anything thrown my way.
Practice being alone makes all the difference. There will come times that you have to be alone, and to not feel so awkward, practice makes perfect. If you are studying in the library, don’t tell anyone and just go and study by yourself. It’s a little step in the right direction and will teach you the value independent studying can have on your grades. Take it a step further and go somewhere you haven’t been before, completely alone. Make sure it’s a safe environment to be alone in, but take the opportunity to get to know the area without anyone else’s opinion.
Your opinion is the only one that matters for most of your life. Take advantage now of the time to explore your thoughts and ideas. A good way to explore your own mind and opinions is to be alone. Go into the world and embrace your own thoughts and learn from them. The only way to really understand yourself is to spend some time alone thinking and developing your own views on the world.
If the idea of being alone terrifies you, take charge now to turn your relationship with yourself around. The relationship you have with yourself is the most important one, and the only way to really strengthen it is to be alone and understand and work through your issues. Feel your emotions and take deep breaths. Tell yourself that it’s okay to be alone. Do things that you feel comfortable doing alone until you are more comfortable doing them alone and escalate. Spend some time reflecting on yourself and your thoughts. Your relationship with yourself should be a priority, and this relationship will be improved drastically by spending some time alone.
